#like i imagine he'd be so annoyed
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jonathanbyersphd · 1 year ago
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Jonathan having to work at family video in s5 and that's part of why he and Robin become besties 🙏 (Steve is pouting in the corner with the cardboard cutout of Phoebe Cates)
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averycutesalamander · 5 months ago
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i have extremely neutral opinions about SMAUs (social media AUs) but i just thought about what Boothill's role would be in one and im kind of losing my mind about it.
his account handle is @.silvergunshura and he literally only posts clumsy nature photos and occasional pics of his gun. a handful of videos that are just the sound of the wilds. never puts any captions or tags on his posts. extremely long unacknowledged absences with no schedule. double-digit amount of followers at an absolute maximum. absolutely no interaction with his audience. or anyone else on the platform actually. quite frankly he doesn't pay any attention to his following in the slightest. bro simply cannot be bothered. for all he cares he is sending these photos to the void and there are no other users on the platform.
and then he posts one (1) video of him at the shooting range nailing bullseyes left and right like it's nothing. barely half of his body is in frame and most of his face is covered by his hair. someone with a decent following shares it and his entire fucking profile EXPLODES because people will NOT stop talking about how hot he is and it kinda snowballs from there. people go through his entire backlog only to find ZERO other posts with his face or body in them. the best they get is little snippets of his arms. people are frothing at the fucking mouth trying to figure out who he is and nobody knows because he literally hasn't said a single word in his entire posting history. people make theory posts, which obviously gets more people invested in this new mystery. his comments are filled with people speculating about who he is and what the fuck he's doing. someone posts a massive spreadsheet detailing all of the identifiable locations in his posts, and they're literally all over the galaxy. immediately afterwards they're cancelled for some vague allegations about them being a shady intelligentsia guild member guilty of multiple human rights violations and everybody completely forgets about the spreadsheet.
Boothill posts a single blurry photo of his hand feeding a chipmunk and people lose their goddamn minds. he follows this up an hour later with a photo of the same chipmunk sitting on his shoulder that is somehow even blurrier than the last and it briefly trends on the front page. a week later he uploads a video of him playing a harmonica by a campfire, once again barely in frame, lit only by the flickering fire. people brighten the video in a desperate attempt to get a better look at his face, but there's nothing identifiable. someone posts a slightly unhinged video examining the tiniest pixels in every screencap of him that they can find, claiming that he's definitely a halovian because of some extremely blurry details, and you technically can't deny it as a possibility because there are no clear shots of where his halo or wings would be. naturally this severely divides fans, and several other theories about his species pop up over the course of a few days. many people are called morons from all sides.
the REAL drama comes when he posts a picture where he's holding what looks suspiciously like an extremely precious meteorite-formed gem that was stolen during a private IPC auction two weeks ago. this post is also notable because it's the first time he's used a caption and it's literally just "lol". naturally people quickly connects the dots and realize that he's BOOTHILL, that crazy motherfucker with the vendetta against the IPC, and why the fuck is he posting nature photos and videos of him feeding birds and shit. silvergunshura fans are instantly divided by discourse about whether or not it's ethical to be a fan. "silvergun fans dni" and "silvergun antis dni" become staples in the bios of people invested in the drama. a bunch of fans start using his substitute swears, and whether or not this is ironic is extremely debatable. the business of cyborg modifications has a moderate boom. anti-IPC sentiments have a notable increase, but now the people doing serious exposés and earnest discussion about the humanitarian crimes of the IPC that are concealed from the public are constantly called simps. there's a brief stint with a handful of Boothill copycat crimes that are all solved within the week.
people unsuccessfully try to hunt down any other potential socials to no avail, but this does spawn a massive wave of fake accounts on a million different platforms, which obviously successfully baits a ton of people. the drama gets even spicier when the moderators shut down his account. one of the mods gets doxxed by an outraged fan. even more fake accounts pop up. Boothill comes back less than a week later as @.silvercowboy244 like nothing happened. his returning post is a crooked picture of a sorta weird looking tree, and he's pointing toward the top left of the frame. the caption is just "bird?" and nobody can figure out what the FUCK that's supposed to mean, because there's no bird visible in the picture, nor is there a bird nest in the tree. conspiracy theories and decoders are immediately chomping at the bit trying to figure out if it has some kind of secret meaning.
tons of people try to use his posts to pinpoint his location for clout or the bounty money or to find him in person and beg him to let them give him head, but he never posts them exactly when they're taken, and nobody can figure out what the fuck logic he's using to pick his next destination. there's an IPC investigation. his accounts keep getting banned but he keeps coming back like a cockroach. dedicated fan archives are made to preserve all of his shitty photos. he never acknowledges any of the drama.
if you're fortunate enough to know Boothill personally and you ask him about all of that weird shit with his socials, he just shrugs and says, "yep, i keep gettin' locked out. can't remember passwords for shirt." if you ask him what he thinks of all the drama surrounding his online presence, he gives you the most bewildered expression you've ever seen on his face. "what the fork are you yappin' about?? what do you mean i got "band" ?? disk horse??? docksing???? i think you've got a few screws loose buddy" and he promptly forgets about the entire ordeal and goes back to posting blurry nature pictures like literally nothing happened.
edit: here's part two-ish lol
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vaguely-concerned · 7 months ago
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I've been picking mostly only the essential flirt options with lucanis in the romance so far (I've personally found the dynamic much more natural and mutual when you do that, more like forming a solid friendship slowly and inevitably becoming something else and less like you keep pushing on him and getting little back b/c he seemingly just gets overwhelmed and goes into freeze instead), and I think rye is a pretty hard person to read at the best of times even though he's been Down Real Bad from pretty early on and their chemistry as people is naturally really good. so the way the almost-kiss plays out in this playthrough feels a lot like it has the added layer of lucanis realizing that no but for sure rook is flirting and not just being kind or a good friend* it IS actually happening it's not just wishful/fearful thinking!!! and then uh. maybe going a bit too hard a bit too fast in all the excitement at that revelation haha
*in lucanis' defense he has seemingly literally never had a friend who wasn't his cousin-brother before, under those circumstances I suppose some confusion is extremely natural if not outright expected lmao
#meanwhile rook is kicking himself for being unprofessional b/c he WAS getting something important from spite there#and also lucanis had like. just woken up was that cool of me. should I have told him. should I have slowed that down???#watcher's duty crashing into watcher's longing blues ensues#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#rook x lucanis#rookanis#I think I might have done something hilarious and a little wonderful to the lucanis romance#by making a rook who's even slower to romance than he is fhskjfhsa#even here I was straight up like 'oh this is a little early for this don't you think' on rye's behalf (it's not we have to be mid-game)#imagine how he'd fare in some of the other romances you'd just bowl him over. davrin might kill him#(and also they would kill each other for unrelated reasons during it but that's another matter (affectionate I love my lads))#lucanis has been squinting at rook in stolen moments ever since the café scene like '...did I imagine that vibe. surely not right.#i'm pretty sure. but am I. I do know he likes me. but DOES he like like me or is that just what I want it to be. this is very embarrassing#for everyone involved' (it is)#davrin has had both their numbers the entire time tho. and been extremely annoyed but professional about it#he knew from the moment these two chucklefucks showed up in his recruitment mission. and has been an adult about it. mostly#even when they've made it real hard ('so I'm gonna go ahead and assume you're not letting the abomination serial killer run around#just because you're transparently excruciatingly sweet on him. right. RIGHT??')#I have accidentally given lucanis a pattern of falling for people who keep covered neck to toe at all times#but like not to be a metaphor for their emotional intimacy issues or anything haha. imagine.#I'm making my own heart so tender by imagining lucanis struggling to get rye out of his (many-layered) robes during the romance scene#and both of them laughing right from the soul in relief and delight at each other b/c like 'how could I kill a god only to be bested#by nevarran fashion. also how in the maker's name do you get dressed so quickly in the mornings this is intense'#'same way one does anything else lots of practice and a can-do attitude'/'well I'll just have to put in the practice then'#and they just hug for a while. *head in my hands* yeah okay I can be normal. I can be normal about this.
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whatareudoinginmyhouse · 2 years ago
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Random headcanon: When Peepers sneezes it sounds like a squeaky-toy that's been violently squeezed, because that's what it sounds like when I sneeze 🤧
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beevean · 6 days ago
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🌹🌹
I have a cold, my eyes are watering, and I hate that this comes easy to me 😔
~
“Mh mh,” she hums in confirmation. He doesn’t need to know the details, or he might lose motivation to cooperate… or worse, ask questions. So she asks: “And you? Planning to go to sleep?”
Hector stammers an answer, but he’s not fluent enough yet. In time and with her help, Lenore is sure, he would feel right at home in Styria. So she forgives him when, placing his hammer on the forge and turning his body towards her, he switches to his native Greek: “Right now that you have come to see me? It would be rude. It’s getting easier, staying awake at night. Perhaps my time in the cell—”
He stops dead in his tracks. His heart skips a beat. Lenore cocks her head, intrigued by the split second of dread settling in his eyes.
“No, nevermind. I was already used to it when I served Dracula. I’ve been living with creatures of the night longer than I realized,” he smiles, eventually.
The poor thing. To think that her sisters were eager to let him suffer in that hole. But he’s not completely broken: Lenore has hope.
“Good boy, living the vampire life,” she purrs, walking to the nearest chair in her best posture. ��Your German is getting better too.” That is only half a lie: she can’t expect a human to learn another language in a handful of weeks, but she is always one to praise effort. Maybe if Carmilla followed her advice, she wouldn’t have made a fool of herself. Then again, Lenore wouldn’t have met Hector, so perhaps she should be grateful for her sister’s stubbornness.
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viperwhispered · 1 year ago
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Ngl I've always headcanoned my yuu to befriend kalim and be his cheerleader, moral support, and a coach (if needed) to accelerate kalim's growth in life-skill learning because I want his retainer all to myself lmao. Call it investment or whatever
Hasdfh let’s hope your Yuu is careful enough not to give Kalim a disproportionate amount of attention or said retainer might get very much the wrong idea.
What a way to be thinking ahead to get what you want, truly diligence worthy of Scarabia.
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littlespoonevan · 1 year ago
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tragic: the song i've been obsessing over for two days straight is actually best represented by buck and abby's relationship and i will never be able to convince someone to have an in depth discussion about it with me and/or make a gifset of it 💔
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odogarons · 6 months ago
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I havent talked a lot about my Rook but trust me when I tell you I love my little Crow
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mariemariemaria · 7 months ago
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can't lie g/omens fans are starting to piss me off
#cant rlly talk bc i watched it too like#but i cant imagine being so attached to a show that you are SOO desperate for s3 that you don't seem to care that one of the creators has#multiple extremely credible allegations against him. which when they were revealed a lot of his long term fanbase reacted by saying#'yeah that tracks there were rumours about him for years' like hello?????#are you really so desperate for a ship portrayed by two straight men and written by a straight creep to become canon??#remember when people tried to discredit the allegations by saying the timing was suspicious wrt the uk election. wild#also WHY did it take so long for mainstream media outlets to report on it. so weird i wanna know what happened there#like as far as i can see the bbc still hasn't reported on it???#which is crazy atp. he's not a household name but his work was successful and a lot of people would probably have heard of go or coraline#okay so i wrote this post and then googled and found out he'd been fired from the show. which GOOD#and then saved this to the drafts bc i figured it wasn't relevant anymore#but then i went into the tag and saw the fucking destiel meme meme saying 'we're not getting a full season :(' FUCK OFF OMG#the man has such credible allegations against him that even big corporations are refusing to employ him again#and the reaction is 'but we no longer get six hours of tv' oh my god#it's so late and im so tired maybe i won't be so annoyed about this after a full night's sleep#unlikely tho
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centaursquizzical · 11 months ago
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i was feeling bad so i made more stamps and watched droids . as one typically does . or something
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rearranging-deck-chairs · 2 years ago
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things 10 does that make yaz feel like oh yeah this is her doctor alright: flying the tardis, when he gets all nerdy abt sciency stuff
things 10 does that make yaz stare in stunned disbelief: flirty as fuck?? timelords this timelords that
things 10 does that make yaz zone out for five minutes entertaining fantasies that are confusing in the way only things involved with time travel can be: brainy specs
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deus-and-the-machina · 2 years ago
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I havent really been into the current state of the JJK manga for a while, im at the point where its ending might hold some value for me as someone who was already invested in the characters but largely aside from seeing how a few things pan out I just really really couldn't care less. 
that being said I have to thank gege for every new chapter giving us more and more good looking Gojos. the more feral and covered in blood the better, and hoo boy am I getting that.
#god can he just kill sukuna already tho. like idc about this I want gojo v kenjaku#im of two minds on the megumi thing bc I do think its weird that gojo hasn't had any strong thoughts about potentially killing megumi#(tho i do think gege is like. holding them back rather than ignoring them) but I also think the fandom forgets their canon relationship#like yeah its nice to imagine them as a wholesome family but I dont think they even think of themselves as father and son at all lol#guardian and ward morelike. and I do think gojo was a decent guardian but I also dont think that recently traumatized and also annoying#teen gojo was ever like. very emotionally available or comforting. not to say it shouldn't be expected for gojo to be upset about this but#also I think people can get a little too wrapped up in their wholesome family pics. bc for one you can bet your ass gege doesnt care about#tsumiki enough to consider whether gojo was technically her guardian as well and how he'd care about her fate. or even nobaras it seems#holding out for gojo to be simply repressing his feelings and it biting him in the ass later but idk#he DID look strained when realizing megumis soul recognized ultimate void tho :(((( that does make me said :((((((#anyways sukuna was a fine enough villain for me but ngl hes gotten a lil annoying likewhatevs dude idc. kenjaku is hells more cunty than you#normally I wouldn't mind his shallow motives and didnt bc he was a threat that contributed to the plot but now that hes out and running#loose hes just so boring idk. like you're just gonna fight stuff. ok. lame. kenjaku vs gojo might actually have some emotional weight to it#idc about this fight and idc about sukuna#like when gojo mentioned his students and they all grinned. that! that that that he cares about them ok gege!#jujutsu kaisen#jjk 230
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dandyshucks · 1 year ago
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idk what to call them but why are the doctor's assistants/passengers/guests/associates/etc SO RUDE about alien appearances. like girl that is AN ALIEN. of course theyre going to look different than a human. if i saw a guy with a bunch of tangled tentacles for a mouth and fish-goat eyes, i'd simply be cool about it. RIP to all the gals i've seen on the show so far but i'd be different.
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four-bastard-bustle · 2 years ago
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God, if you put the boys in the LISA universe they'd be some of the most fucked up unstable guys ever
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floorpancakes · 10 days ago
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i have no idea how to put this but other than the actual things they end up doing both halves of dough water have a really good resume of skills and personality traits you can imagine them doing all sorts of jobs or hobbies in AU scenarios. mostly i like to imagine them volunteering with animal shelters tho its like free serotonin
#i also just cannot picture their relationship in any happy end au WITHOUT them adopting at least three cats#its clamps fault for repeatedly associating watanukis depression with dead cats#imagining worlds where watanuki gets to heal goes hand in hand with cats that are not dead!!!#douwata#also meki is famously a fan of funny little guys and i think he would be an excellent pet parent#my parents used to tell me stories of their cat that jumped on people's shoulders i feel like that would happen to doumeki a lot#what are broad shoulders for if not to have a whole ass cat perching on them like a pirate with a parrot#in general my 'doumeki gets along well with/acts similar to various critters' hc has gotten out of control#please imagine doumeki eating snacks and he breaks off a little bit and hes like here you go dude and hands a piece to a rat and they both#start cronching in unison#but also he has the calm and funny emotionally intelligent demeanor that matches well with rabbits...#and dont get me started on the hamsters#hes also athletic and can put up with lots of silly nonsense so he'd kick it with a dog too#and theres of course the cliche of someone playing with a cat and immediately thinking of their cat coded partner....#he would probably enjoy ferrets in a memey kind of way cause they remind him of teen watanukis mannerisms#and you cannot tell me he wouldnt have fun with frogs. imagine him putting a funny hat on a frog#i could keep going.#hes also just got that holistic kinda understanding of life and death and drive where hed probably be stable in touch and go situations#sorry this just became imagine doumeki with funny animals hours again ...#i think about it all the time#i also think about watanuki rescuing a cat and what that would make him feel cause hes been projecting all this time#i think itd break him a little bit in a 'this is fixing me' kind of way#and then he'd immediately become a super protective and annoying pet parent itd be so CUTE#only home cooked meals for his little guys ...gourmet style...#forgot to mention birds. doumeki would find birds so entertaining. birds could be his oomfs especially smth like a pigeon
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a-hermit-pining · 3 months ago
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LADS Men React a Picture of You with Another guy
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Request: Hii!! I love your writing so so much (pls never stop)!!! How do you think the lads men would react to the following scenario: mc makes one of her girl friends dress like a guy and post that on her story/moments (to ward off an annoying co-worker, like what Caleb did in uni, but mc didnt want to bother the guys with this request so she asked Tara or another one of her girl friends). The picture, though, is convincing enough to make even the lads men question if she actually does have a partner and who tf is he. I think Xavier would absolutely malfunction since they are also neighbours lol
AN: I am taking a break from the ship event to gather some inspiration. But this was super fun to write. Thank you for sending in such an amazing idea.
Warning: Potential Spoilers. Be Mindful 👺
Pairing: Lads boys x fem reader
Genre: fluff and angst
(I do not own these characters)
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Summary: Waking up after an amazing girls' night, you and Tara spent the morning taking silly photos, making all kinds of concerning faces, until inspiration struck.
"Wait, wait, hold on," Tara grinned, pushing her short hair back. "What if—"
Moments later, you were both giggling uncontrollably, staging fake hard launch photos in your bed. The blurry, cozy results? Surprisingly convincing.
"Oh, this is gonna blow up at work."
Tara rested her chin on your neck, wrapping an arm around you for the final shot. The picture was better than you imagined, so naturally, you posted it to your story before the two of you rushed to get ready for work.
And just like that, your social media went up in flames.
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Rafayel:
623 missed calls. 200 texts. 82 more missed calls.
All hours after your post.
Who is he? Why are you in bed with him? Is he your boyfriend? What is his name?
You barely have time to breathe after your meeting before the onslaught of texts floods in. Even the comment section of your post hasn’t been spared.
Thomas is already on the case. Rafayel is whining, sobbing, crying and absolutely not afraid to play dirty to get you back.
He's already planned a hundred ways to nip this budding romance at the root.
He thinks he has the upper hand, feels kinda smug about it too.
Still… there’s a twinge of heartbreak. A little ache for having to wait longer for you, for the idea that you might have chosen someone else. But if nothing else, Rafayel is persistent.
So, of course, he’s already forgiven you.
But don’t think, even for a second, that he won’t complain about it.
He’s still mulling over it, dramatically painting all his canvases black, getting ready for his villain arc, when you finally call him back.
"A prank?"
He is indignant.
He cried over a prank.
All that effort… for nothing.
"IT’S BEEN 800 YEARS. JELLYFISH ARE WALKING. NAKED SEA TURTLES ARE CLIMBING TREES. SHARKS ARE EATING GRASS—FOR FREE. "
AND RAFAYEL?
RAFAYEL CRIED OVER A PRANK.
HE WENT FULL VILLAIN ARC FOR A LIE.
HIS CANVASES ARE BLACK. HIS PLANS FOR REVENGE? RUINED.
ALL BECAUSE YOU AND TARA WANTED TO PLAY GAMES.
He might never recover. Might. But first, he needs to call Thomas back before his "investigation" starts a national crisis.
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Xavier:
He had just returned from a long night of fighting Wanderers when his phone chimed with an alert.
Half-asleep, he smiled at the sight of your name, already thinking of how he'd respond once he changed and collapsed into bed.
That smile froze the moment he saw the picture.
The phone slipped from his fingers, landing on his face. But he didn’t even wince. Too numb to feel it.
His vision blurred. His chest ached. Tears welled, unbidden.
Genuinely heartbroken. So weary. So tired. For a moment, he was shattered.
Did he have the strength to wager another lifetime?
His time was already running out. His strength faded with each passing day. He had selfishly wanted this spring with you...but this was better for you. You were too kind, too caring to bear his loss.
Perhaps this was for the best. His lips trembled at the thought.
You had someone now, someone who would not bring you grief. And you looked so happy in that photo. He stared at the blurred curve of your smile, tracing it with his gaze.
Somehow, he managed a small smile too.
And then he folded into himself. And slept.
For days.
So long that you started to worry, noticing his absence at work.
Until, finally, you barge into his apartment, breathless and frantic, only to find him asleep, moonlight spilling across his face, eerily still.
Your heart plummeted.
"Xavier." Your voice trembled as you rushed to him, fingers shaking as you took his hand.
For a terrible, suffocating second, he didn’t move.
And then, his brow twitched.
Air rushed back into your lungs.
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Zayne:
This was to be expected.
He was never what you needed.
He often failed at words. His gestures, too vague to be understood.
You deserved someone who loved you. Someone who had the courage to say those words out loud.
Not him.
Not someone who could hurt you. His scars only grow deeper with time.
So he accepts it. Buries himself in work.
If he could not be your lover, then he would play his part as a friend.
Pays extra attention to your health. Pours over your reports. He must. Because he is no longer close enough to watch over you himself.
And weeks later, when you finally visit him, he keeps up the act—cold, distant, unbothered.
He does all the tests. Runs all the checks. Everything is routine.
But you see it.
The dark circles, deeper than ever. His skin, paler. Cheeks, sunken. His shirt, unwashed.
"You're coming home with me."
Your voice leaves no room for argument as you take his hand. "You never call. You only text about my reports and nothing more. We need to talk."
You tug him forward. He follows, until he stops.
"Your boyfriend won’t like it," he murmurs, staring anywhere but at you.
Silence.
"What boyfriend?"
You blink at him, dumbfounded.
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Sylus:
Sylus spits his coffee, choking as he stares at the pictures.
Does not buy it.
That’s clearly not a man.
Yet somehow, he keeps going back to it, again and again.
It’s only when Luke and Kieran peer over his shoulder that his denial starts cracking.
"Ooooh, boss has got competition," Luke chimes.
One minute, they’re laughing. The next, they’re outside the mansion, the door slamming shut behind them.
Luke blinks. "That explains..."
Kieran yanks him into a chokehold for getting them banished for the day.
Inside, Sylus switches to wine.
The day has been too much.
Not a man, right? he muses, scrutinizing the photo, before accidentally pressing the heart button.
And then, he all but chews the glass in his hand.
He’s not worried.
He just suddenly feels the urge to burn his entire closet because nothing looks good enough.
He doesn’t care.
He’s just made a few calls, just to make sure you’re not involved with anyone sketchy. Unless, of course, it’s him.
Then, like an absolute idiot, he gets a panicked call from an associate.
The only person who’s been in your apartment? Tara.
Sylus stares at the image. Facepalms.
That evening, when he picks you up from work, he looks exhausted.
As if a few hours have aged him years.
When you ask, he waves you off, dodging every question.
You raise a brow. "Are you sure? You look—"
"I said it’s nothing," he snaps, before sighing, dragging a hand down his face. "...Can we just go home
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Caleb:
Storming to Linkon.
Geared up to blow up the entire apartment complex.
Spends five minutes struggling with the locked door before finally getting it open.
Marches in.
Stops. Sighs in disapproval at your empty fridge.
Good thing he packed snacks. Leaves them on your counter. You’ll thank him later.
Then, back to the mission.
Collects all forensic evidence needed. Marches out.
No time to waste.
Supervises the DNA administration.
Hair sample. Used coffee mug. Both next to yours.
He will find the bastard. He will take him out.
And then, he will whisk you away to Skyheaven, to console you once you learn of your tragic, mysterious loss.
Grief will bring you closer.
Every intern running tests is sweating.
So are the lead scientists, who have been personally forced to oversee this insanity.
No one is messing with the colonel today.
And then, finally, the results land on his desk.
Caleb stares. Dumbfounded.
Is he to fight both men and women for you now?
You better watch out for Tara because he does not discriminate.
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